What I Did on Rapture Day

On the off chance you missed all the headlines, not to mention the promos for the new version of the movie The Omen, today was 06-06-06. Depending entirely upon who you believe today would either mark the birth of the antichrist, his/her rise to power, or the rapture. So if you believe any of this, and you're reading this post, you missed the bus. Or the train. Or the helicopter. Or whatever it is your supposed to ride in to get to heaven. You're stuck here with the rest of us. Sorry.

In the far future you'll be able to sit down with the grandkids and talk fondly about where you were when the rapture came. It'll be our generation's version of the assasination of JFK. When there's a lull at a party you'll look over at the co-worker with the ineffectual combover and ask, "So, where were you?"

And they'll know exactly what you mean.

On the day of the rapture I had a job interview.

This was an interview for an entry-level job in a public library. Part-time at that. While I'd actually be making less money than I am now if I get this job it would hopefully lead to other things as I go further along in library school. The weird part was that for this relatively low-level, low-paid position I was interviewed by a panel of five people. I felt like I was up for review at a law firm. Or up for paroll. Their questions were prepared ahead of time, and were read directly from the script they all held in front of them. Apparently they couldn't deviate from the script because there were no followup questions, and no real dialogue. The interviewers looked at their scripts with their red-rimmed zombie eyes while they read and took notes with their craggy fingers while I spoke. I barely even made eye contact with any of them during the whole process. If they decide to hire me they can't possibly even remember what I look like. It was a painfullly dry ordeal. The interview started at 5:00, so when 6:06 rolled around I started praying some of the interviewers would be pulled up through the rapture but not one fled to the great reward. Apparently librarians are just as deviant as the rest of us. Hell, apparently the whole area I live in is pretty deviant. With all the traffic jams I ran into afterward it took me 30 minutes to make the 5 mile drive home.

So I guess while rapture day for me was a little odd, it wasn't at all scary. No demons, no hellfire, no curses. In fact, the only scary thing about today is that Julia Stiles is in a movie that doesn't make her dance.

Excelsior.